Lucy Kellaway’s dictionary of business jargon and corporate nonsense
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Corporate family

Translation into plain English Colleagues

Perpetrator Larry Page, Alphabet (formerly Google)

Usage example "I look forward to welcoming Motorolans to our family of Googlers."

Lucy’s commentary The idea that employees are somehow part of the family is one of the most delusional metaphors of modern corporate life. In Motorola's case, their business was sold off to Lenovo, shoving them in the direction of another foster home.

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